Dark Tournament Gone Worse
by Lady-darkdaisy
Summary: You know, I always wanted to shove Toguro into a broom closet. Watch me do this and more as I replace Team Toguro in the final round of the tournament with my own nutty bunch of minions. Completed
1. Now Where In the World Is Team Toguro

Dark Tournament, Geniusss9 Style!  
  
*At the Dark Tournament, right after Team Urameshi advances from the Semifinals*  
  
Kurama: If we thought they were tough, Team Toguro is next.  
  
Hiei: Yusuke better be in good shape for that fight, or we are doomed... Team Toguro  
  
isn't a slouch team, like those other ones were.  
  
Kuwabara: Team Toguro this, Team Toguro that. Big deal, we can slaughter them!  
  
Genkai: Don't get too cocky. You couldn't even handle Toguro when he was under 50%.  
  
What makes you think you can beat him now?  
  
Kuwabara: *Lost for words* Well... um... Shut up, you old grandma!  
  
Genkai: This old grandma could kick your ass!  
  
Hiei: Hah. Stupid human.  
  
*Meanwhile, in one of the upper boxes*  
  
Toguro: Tomorrow will be your last, Urameshi...  
  
*Door busts open, and Dythonen and Geniusss9 are standing there.*  
  
Toguro: Wha? Who are you?  
  
Dythonen: *Holds up a roll of Magic Duct Tape* you're coming with us.  
  
Team Toguro: *All tied up and gagged in an empty broom closet* Mmmmph.  
  
Mmmmmph!!!  
  
Geniusss9: Oh be quiet.  
  
*The next day in the Arena. The sun isn't shining, the clouds are threatening... A perfect  
  
day... well... from a demon's point of view anyway...*  
  
Juri: Ladies and Gentledemons! The finals are beginning! At our right, Team Urameshi!  
  
Crowd: Boo! Boo! Boooooo!  
  
Kuwabara: Screw you all!  
  
Juri: And on our left, Team Toguro!  
  
Crowd: YAY!!!!! *Cheer, but quiet down after they see that Team Toguro isn't there, but  
  
a new team is*  
  
Juri: Umm... where's Team Toguro?  
  
Geniusss9: Toguro suffered an unfortunate... "Accident". We're the replacements.  
  
Juri: Well... Lets give a hand to the mysterious replacement team!  
  
Crowd: Booo! We want Toguro!  
  
Juri: Captains, step into the arena and decide the matches!  
  
Yusuke: One on one.  
  
Geniusss9: Sure. Lets go old school then.  
  
*On the scoreboard. The matches are as following*  
  
The Drummer Vs. Kuwabara  
  
Sara, the Demon Sister from Hell Vs. Kurama  
  
Dythonen Vs. Hiei  
  
Seymour Buns Vs. Genkai  
  
Geniusss9 Vs. Yusuke  
  
Juri: Let the firs- *Drumroll*  
  
Geniusss9: Damnit! I am so going to kill you after this!  
  
Kuwabara: Don't worry man, I'll do that for you.  
  
Drummer: You want a piece of me, Biatch?  
  
Kuwabara: Bring it, foo!  
  
Dythonen: He's probably stronger than you, stupid drummer punk. AHAHAHA- *Gets shot*  
  
OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW  
  
WWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You ass!  
  
Drummer: *Waves his Uzi* Serves you right, punk.. *Sticks his tongue out at Dythonen*  
  
Juri: Let the match... Begin!  
  
*Kuwabara and the Drummer walk up to the platform*  
  
Drummer: Time to die, kid.  
  
Kuwabara: Same to you, Drummer Boy!  
  
CLIFFIE!  
  
R+R 


	2. Team Fool Face Off

Disclaimer: I don't own YYH. Note: If you don't know who the heck my minions are,  
  
read my bio. The Drummer isn't mentioned in my bio, but he's in my talk show fic.  
  
Dark Tournament Gone Worse Chapter Two  
  
*Kuwabara and the Drummer get ready to face off*  
  
Kuwabara: Let's go! Spirit Sword! *Summons his trademark technique* Lets go, little  
  
drummer boy! *Charges the Drummer*  
  
Drummer: Fanfare of Doom! *Bangs on his drum*  
  
RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
HH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *His power doubles. Whams the rushing Kuwabara aside with a  
  
brutal elbow slam*  
  
Kuwabara: OWW! You're in for it, bucko!  
  
Drummer: Oh yea? *Pulls out his Uzi and fires erratically at Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabara: Too bad for you, I watch too many movies! *Gets Jedi Style on the oncoming  
  
projectiles*  
  
Drummer: Hmmm... Let's try this then! Spirit Uzi Attack! *Shoots a wave of spirit  
  
bullets at Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabara: That trick doesn't work on me! YAAAAA! *Tries going Jedi Style again, but  
  
the bullets are too powerful and knock him back*  
  
Yusuke: Damn you Drummer, I have patents on all forms of spirit guns! *Holds up a  
  
paper from the U.S. Patent Office*  
  
All: *Sweatdrop/Anime Fall*  
  
Drummer: Too bad. Let's go for a second helping, eh Kuwabara? Spirit Uzi Attack!  
  
*Fires at Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabara: If one sword won't do, then I'll use two! Spirit Sword Double! *Manages to  
  
hold back the drummer's attack*  
  
Drummer: Damn. I need a new strategy.  
  
Kuwabaka: You're no match for me. Give up. Hey! Wait one frickin' minute! YOU  
  
BASTARD AUTHOR!  
  
Hiei: Hn. That's my phrase. Thief. (Look who's talking)  
  
Author: Sorry...  
  
Drummer: I'll defeat you yet, Kuwabara. Bad Music Attack! *Plays horrible music on his  
  
drum*  
  
All: AHHHHHHHH SAVE US! HE SUCKS! *Everyone is writhing in agony*  
  
Kuwabara: *Pulls lint from his pocket and blocks his ears* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  
  
*Is talking unusually loud* Now lets finish this!  
  
Drummer: Alrighty then. Lets play it your way.  
  
Kuwabara: Huh? Repeat please.  
  
Drummer: I said, lets play it your way.  
  
Kuwabara: What? Speak louder.  
  
Drummer: I SAID, LETS PLAY IT YOUR DAMN WAY!  
  
Kuwabara: Oh. Why didn't you say so before? Oh, I forgot. *Takes the lint out of his  
  
ears*  
  
Drummer: *Fuming* I challenge you to a sword duel. *An invisible hand smacks  
  
Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabak- I mean Kuwabara: Huh? You don't have psychic powers.  
  
Mewtwo: *Up in the crowd* | No, But I Do. HeeHeeHee |  
  
Drummer: Spirit Bayonet! *An energy bayonet attaches itself to the Drummer's Uzi*  
  
Lets duke it out! Rahhhhhh! *Rushes Kuwabara*  
  
Kuwabara: Spirit Sword! *Rushes the Drummer*  
  
K + D: *Simultaneously* Spirit Sword/ Bayonet get Long!  
  
*Collide into each's extended spirit weapon and fly out of the arena, unconscious*  
  
Juri: Oh, they're out. 10...9...8...7...6...5...4...3...2...1...0! It ends in a tie! Neither  
  
wins!  
  
Sara, the Demon Sister From Hell: Now it's my turn. *Unleashes a terrifying demonic  
  
aura*  
  
Kurama: *Gulp*  
  
R+R 


	3. Man Thats Gonna Hurt

Dark Tournament Gone Worse Chapter Three  
  
*At the Dark Tournament's Center Stage Arena*  
  
Juri: Alright, demon fans! Let's get this party started!  
  
Crowd: YEAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! KILL!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Geniusss9: Alright, let her out. *Three of the men in suits come out and free her from her  
  
straightjacket and take off her handcuffs. A single half second later, their mutilated  
  
bodies are strewn across the ground, and Sara is munching on a leg like its fried chicken.  
  
The demon crowd goes wild*  
  
Seymour Bunns: Blearg *Pukes*  
  
Juri: Now that's entertainment! The second match... Begins!!!  
  
Dythonen: This should be quick. I can't wait to fight. *Throws evil stares at Hiei, who, of  
  
course, throws them right back. Sara and Kurama step into the ring*  
  
Yusuke: Did you see what she did to those guards? Nice knowing you, Kurama.  
  
Kurama: Oh shut up...  
  
Sara, the Demon Sister from Hell: ^-^ Kill!!!  
  
Kurama: May the best...demon win? *Shaking nervously*  
  
Sara: You are lucky me nots a fangirl or me would do other things than shredders you.  
  
*Unsheathes her claw-like weapons*  
  
Kurama: *Gets a hold on himself and stops shaking* let's GO! ROSEWHIP! *Launches  
  
a complicated attack pattern*  
  
Sara: *Blocks every whiplash and then grabs the whip and breaks it* Yawn  
  
Kurama, Yusuke, Hiei, Genkai, Botan, Koenma, and Kuwabara who is barely conscious  
  
and will fall back unconscious after he says this in unison with the rest of Team Urameshi (Bit long for a name, isn't it?): IMPOSSIBLE!!  
  
Kurama:  
  
OhNoOhMyGodI'mGonnaDieSomeOneSaveMePleaseVerySoonI'mTooYoungToDieNo  
  
WaitScratchThatI'mNotThatYoungNevermindIDon'tWannaDie! *Says this VERY fast*  
  
Sara: Hells bells are tolling for you *AC/DC music starts playing*  
  
*In the deep recesses of Kurama's mind*  
  
Yoko: Free me. It's our only hope  
  
Kurama: Hell No!  
  
Yoko: I don't want to die!  
  
Kurama: You're too strong. You might kill her.  
  
Yoko: Hey man, it's either us, or her.  
  
Kurama: Fine  
  
*Kurama's Spirit Energy increases. By a lot*  
  
Yoko Kurama: Ahh, time to wake up and smell the coffee. As for you... ROSEWHIP!  
  
*This time, Sara is the recipient for ass kicking* AHAHAHAHAHA!  
  
Sara: *Beaten up and bloodied, and backed into a corner* Me never thoughts I would  
  
need to. Against you. Me gets UBER NOW!!! *Sara's Spirit Energy increases by a factor  
  
of 10 times* Me's ultimate transformation! Me make you into jelly!  
  
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
  
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Yoko Kurama: Ohhh shit... Fine! Death Tree! Devour her! *The death tree grows, and  
  
attempts to munch Sara. Attempts.*  
  
TheNewAndImprovedSaraTheDemonSisterFromHell: TREE! Me likes trees! *Hugs it to  
  
death* Hey, where you make tree go! You make tree go bye bye! Me hurts you!  
  
*Smashes Yoko Kurama into the stands, crushing a few fans and knocking him into a  
  
near coma state*  
  
Juri: Ooooo... Hey aint getting up after that one. Sara wins!  
  
Sara: Yay! RARARARARARARAR!!! *Geniusss9 types in his laptop and suddenly,  
  
Sara is imprisoned in the straight jacket again* NOOOOOO!!  
  
Dythonen and Hiei: *Simultaneously* Finally  
  
Don't miss the next action packed episode of Dark Tournament Gone Worse. Wait,  
  
scratch that. No action. Because we at FUNimation, censor everything! Aren't we  
  
special?  
  
R+R 


	4. The Second Shorty Showdown

Dark Tournament Gone Worse Chapter 4:  
  
The Second Shorty Showdown  
  
Juri: Alright, demon fans, let's see if we can get the same gruesome bloodshed from the  
  
last match from these two fighters!  
  
Crowd: Yeaaa!! Kill!  
  
Dythonen: The loser's prize is a one way cruise ticket. To hell.  
  
Hiei: I hope you have reservations.  
  
Dythonen: Actually, I do! *Holds up a hotel pass* I got mine for 45% cheaper on  
  
Priceline.Com! (I don't own that site. So go away, you damn lawyers)  
  
All: *Sweatdrop*  
  
Juri: *Deep announcer voice* LET'S GET READY TO  
  
RRRRRUMBLLLLLLLLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!  
  
Hiei: Hn. I hate to fight a weak fighter such as you. You're not even full demon! I could  
  
kill you with my eyes shut. *Spits at Dythonen*  
  
Dythonen: Yada, Yada, Yada... You're all talk. DARK FLAME ATTACK!!!!!!  
  
Hiei: Very well... FIST OF THE MORTAL FLAME!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*Hiei and Dythonen begin their assaults, throwing hellfire at each other. Both gain slight  
  
burns*  
  
Dythonen: Hmph. Not bad. Let's kick it up a notch. *Unsheathes his scimitar and powers  
  
up*  
  
Hiei: Play it your way then. *Takes out his sword and lunges at Dythonen* PREPARE  
  
TO MEET YOUR MAKER! DIE!!!!!!!!!  
  
*Dythonen barely is able to sidestep the charge, and manages to cut off the headband  
  
covering Hiei's Jigan Eye*  
  
Hiei: No! You.. you almost hit the Jigan Eye! You... will suffer greatly!  
  
RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !  
  
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *Begins the summoning of the Dragon of the Darkness Flame*  
  
Dythonen: Time to test if my new idea works.  
  
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *Begins summoning the  
  
energy to use his Doom technique*  
  
*The entire arena is bathed in a massive dark energy aura*  
  
Hiei: Feel the pain. DRAGON OF THE DARKNESS FLAME! (Wow. It rhymes)  
  
Dythonen: Now to see... *Concentrates all his energy in his pinky finger, then shoots off  
  
an energy ball the size of a pea. Just so you know, his Doom technique has the ability to  
  
deconstruct almost all matter in a 5 meter radius around him. So this is an uber energy ball* DOOM BALL!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
*The two attacks collide. The small energy ball rips through the dragon, and then  
  
detonates. The entire fighting arena is reduced to a smoking crater. Unfortunately, Juri  
  
was killed in the blast. But who cares?!*  
  
Crowd: 0-0!!!  
  
Koto: Sweet! Ding dong, the bitch is dead, the bitch is dead, the bitch is dead. Ding dong,  
  
the slutty bitch is dead! Yay! I get my job back!  
  
*The smoke clears. Both Dythonen and Hiei are still standing, but they're tattered and  
  
exhausted of all their spirit energy. Hiei has lost most of his clothing, except for his  
  
tattered pants. You know what that means?*  
  
Fangirls: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY GET HIM!!!! * An  
  
army of fangirls rushes the stadium*  
  
Geniusss9: *Sighs* *Types in his laptop, and all of the fangirls split into itty bitty pieces*  
  
Sara, the Demon Sister From Hell: *Drools at the fangirl bits*  
  
Geniusss9: Down girl.  
  
Hiei: Surrender now...  
  
Dythonen: Never...  
  
*The two fighters muster up the last remains of their energy and begin a brutal brawl. No  
  
punch, kick or poke in the eye is taboo. Finally, they both fall over in exhaustion*  
  
Koto: Nope, they aint gonna get up for awhile. Tie! Neither team wins!  
  
Genkai: My turn now.  
  
Yusuke: Kick ass, grandma.  
  
Seymour Bunns: *Gulp* Uh oh...  
  
R+R 


	5. The Little Agent Who Couldnt

Dark Tournament Gone Worse Chapter 5:  
  
The Little Agent Who Couldn't  
  
Koto: Well everyone, since Juri is dead, I will now announce!  
  
Juri: *Emerges from the rubble, all messed up* I'm still alive!  
  
Koto: NOO! *Takes out a rifle and shoots Juri through the head* Oohh, she's dead now.  
  
Juri: OWW! YOU SHOT ME! THAT REALLY HURT! YOU SHOT ME YOU  
  
ASSHOL- BANG... *Finally dies*  
  
Koto: *Is putting her rifle away* No one saw that, ok?  
  
Genkai: Cut the theatrics. I'm ready to thrash that punk.  
  
Dythonen: *Whispers to Geniusss9* You idiot! You forgot to give him spirit powers!  
  
He's screwed!  
  
Geniusss9: Yeah... But who cares?  
  
Dythonen: Good point.  
  
Seymour Bunns: *Has a towel around his neck, and is wearing boxing gloves while the  
  
Drummer coaches him* I'm gonna die...  
  
Drummer: The key is to stay angry, and go for the head. Just cuz she's old, doesn't mean  
  
you can go easy on her.  
  
Koto: Let the next match... BEGIN!  
  
Genkai: Well, Mr. Bunns *Says this with scorn* Are you ready for dinner?  
  
Seymour: Wwwwhat's for dddddinner? *Trembling with fear*  
  
Genkai: Your ass on a platter! Take this! *Starts smacking Seymour around*  
  
Seymour: OWWWW STOP, MERCY PLEASE NO DON'T HURT ME, UNCLE,  
  
ZUCCHINI!!!!  
  
Crowd: Kick his pansy ass!  
  
Genkai: *Hits Seymour to the edge of the ring* Surrender now, you little pussy. (Such  
  
vulgar words for a nice little grandma)  
  
Genkai: Hey, don't you call me nice OR grandma, damn author. I'll kick your ass next!  
  
Author: Um... OK...  
  
Seymour: I surrender!!!!  
  
Koto: Hmmmm the rulebook says... *Flips a few pages* Aha! Rule 065: Surrender is not  
  
an option. If they want to give up, kick his/her ass to hell.  
  
Genkai: I'm down with that. *Starts kicking Seymour across the arena again*  
  
Seymour: *Jumps out of the arena and glues himself to the ground* Hah! Now I lose.  
  
Can you please stop!  
  
Dythonen: She will, but we won't.  
  
Seymour: *Gulp*  
  
Koto: Genkai wins! *Genkai starts breakdancing, while Team Genius beats the living  
  
snot out of Seymour for being such a wuss*  
  
(Sorry about Genkai being OOC. Transferring the Spirit Wave Ball or whatever it's called  
  
must've made her go senile)  
  
Genkai: You ass! I'm still sane! *Runs after Author*  
  
Author: SHIT! AHHHHHHHHHHHH *Runs away*  
  
R+R 


	6. Leader Vs Psychotic Author

Dark Tournament Gone Worse Chapter Six:  
  
Leader vs. Psychotic Author  
  
Koto: Well folks, let's get ready for our final match. Leader vs. leader, mano a mano. The  
  
5th and final match... *Drumroll* AH! SECURITY! SHUT HIM UP! *Security chases  
  
after the Drummer* Well... it's Yusuke Urameshi vs. Geniusss9!!!!  
  
Crowd: BOOOOOO!!!  
  
Yusuke: F--- you, F------. Go F--- yourselves you F--- heads. F--- F--- F--- !!!!  
  
(Badmouthed little kid eh? Someone get the soap, we're gonna wash his mouth out)  
  
Koto: Let the match begin!  
  
*Geniusss9 and Yusuke walk into the arena and shake hands as hard as possible, trying to  
  
break each other's fingers.*  
  
Geniusss9: May the best man win.  
  
Yusuke: Yeah, whatever. Tell me, where did you put Toguro?  
  
Geniusss9: I have no clue what you mean.  
  
Yusuke: Don't play dumb with me man... I'm better at it. Wait... did I say that?  
  
All: Uhhh... Yea... *Sweatdrop*  
  
Yusuke: Well... if you won't tell me, I'll make you say! Spirit Gun! *Shoots his  
  
trademark technique*  
  
Geniusss9: Shit! *Dodges just in time* Phew...  
  
Yusuke: Spirit Gun!  
  
Geniusss9: AHHHH *Runs around dodging all the stray spirit ammunition.*  
  
Yusuke: I won't miss this time. Spirit Shotgun!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Geniusss9: Oh... bloody hell. I hoped I wouldn't. ERASER OF DOOM! * Pulls out a small desk eraser. The odd thing is, that the very air around it seems to disintegrate. It  
  
looks like as if the eraser makes everything it touches disappear entirely. Geniusss9  
  
erases all of the shots with it.*  
  
All: What the hell is that?  
  
Geniusss9: it's the most terrifying thing in all of anime world... AN ERASER!!!  
  
All: *Gasp*  
  
Geniusss9: But just to be fair, I will transform myself into my 8th grade self. *Turns into a  
  
gawky, nerdy kid with glasses. Did I say that? I meant a handsome stud. Yeah... that's  
  
what I meant. What? Stop looking at me like I'm lying!*  
  
Yusuke: Let's go, foo!  
  
Geniusss9: Bring your punk ass over here. We finish this in one move. Ready?  
  
Yusuke: SPIRIT SHOTGUN!  
  
Geniusss9: YOSHIHIRO TOGASHI'S ERASER!!! ( For the fools who don't know, he  
  
made YYH)  
  
*The ultimate techniques flew at each other. Just as Yusuke was to be erased, the shotgun  
  
bullets hit Geniusss9, making him lose his concentration and forcing the eraser out of  
  
existence, saving Yusuke's sorry ass*  
  
Geniusss9: Only one way to solve this... KAREOKE! Both teams will participate. * It  
  
starts off with Seymour Bunns singing "Stayin Alive" while Genkai looked at him  
  
evilly.*  
  
Simon Cowell. (I don't own him) Bloody awful.  
  
Team Genius: AHHHHH BRITISH DUDE! RUNAWAY!!! *All run like their asses are  
  
on fire.*  
  
Kuwabara: WE WIN! BOOYAH!  
  
*Just then, Toguro, still bound and gagged, hobbles out*  
  
Toguro: MMMMMMMPPPHHHH! MMMMMPPPHHHH!!!  
  
Team Urameshi: Oh great...  
  
THE END 


End file.
